This 'n That

'Tis Spring! My tulips are up, crocus in full bloom and lots of other colors in the garden beds. Hummingbirds are here year round but really hitting my nectar feeders hard now - must have babies on the way. The squirrels have organized - they have a union now - and demand their corn and peanuts no later than mid morning. Sometimes I see 5 or 6 on the back deck just waiting for me to show up. I keep thinking I should ask His Holiness to install a doorbell at the bottom of the door so they could ring it if I'm tardy with the food.

Woody Woodpecker's baby has had some really bad hair days - orange hair in a punk rock style and a voice like a screeching banshee. (No offense to the banshee lovers out there.)

"Don't tell them about the homeowners letter," Cowboy admonished when he read it.

The homeowners association sent me a letter... someone complained that my Rotts, Tank and Panda, were embarrassing them by making whoopee in the backyard in the middle of the day. Excuse me? I have a 7-foot wooden fence around the backyard. What was that person doing standing on a ladder peeking in?

"SAR!"

SWAT!

Tsk.

"And don't tell them what we often do in the backyard in warmer weather."

I wrote back that they should peek in around 7 p.m. when the giant squid and I are in the backyard and in the gazebo sharing a glass of wine. Sometimes we make whoopee out there. It would make for a better show. Tsk.

"SAR!"

SWAT!

Double Tsk.

Did I mention that the Passover dinner was spectacular? I ate everything, of course. I only had a few sips of wine but the three members of the clergy dining with us really went allllll out. Not sure if the priest and the rabbi were having a "I can drink more than you and still not fall on my face" contest or were just savoring the flavor. I had several different wines to choose from and I noticed the Navy chaplain had a glass of each. We made sure someone sober drove all of them home.

Easter dinner was a big hit. Cowboy refused to share his peach cobbler; good thing I made pineapple upside down cakes. I have a photo of him with his hands around the tray of cobblers and a "commanding officer's" glare on his face. LOL! I shall blow that pic up and use it for ammunition at the appropriate time. (The rabbi ate a LOT of the honey baked ham. Tsk and double tsk.) Cowboy said I should have had something else for the man to eat - like a roast or turkey. I asked the rabbi in advance what he wanted and he told me he'd have whatever we were having. I repeated this to the squid who rolled his eyes and said the man was just being polite. Polite? Polite would have been if he asked for the recipe. Tsk.

David brought me a HUGE basket with small chocolate bunnies (minus the ears - he said it's a new strain of bunnies - tsk) and filled with lots of jellybeans. The big bunny in the middle of the basket was... ready for this? Made out of BLACK JELLYBEANS! swooooon

Naturally, I bit off its head which grossed everybody out - except 8-about-to-be-9-year-old Patrick who said that was coooooool beans. I do adore that child.

Took the pups to local obedience trials. Six dogs in Cowboy's SUV take up a lot of room - left Tank and Panda home. My babies, SweetPea and BullyBoy went through a refresher trial; I used hand signals only and they flew threw easily. I've taught both dogs to "heel" back to me when they are in front of me by moving back into position at my side (going in reverse) rather than walking around me. It makes for a bit of entertainment and everyone gets a kick out of it. Both pups knew they did well and were jumping at the applause. I promised them wine and beer when we got home. Of course, we had to wait until the giant squid went off to do giant squid things before they could imbibe.

The foster dogs: Tuma, the Alaskan Malamute, did wonderfully well and he leaves this weekend for his new home. The family that adopted him has three small boys - a good match for an energetic pup. Murdoch, the Deerhound, also did well and he moved in to his new home yesterday - a family that does a lot of hiking and camping - another good match.

Oliver, the English Mastiff, rolled over in the middle of the trials, lifted his head to see who would scratch his belly and... we'll have to work a little harder to get him to pass. A couple of older gentlemen - brothers - adopted Daisy, another English Mastiff, from me over a year ago and have their eye on Oliver. They want Daisy to have a companion and I think that might be a good match, too. Daisy is extraordinarily spoiled by her owners - something I adore seeing, especially for a rescue dog.

Archie, the senior canine Bloodhound, howled through all the events and refused to go into the ring with me. We had a brief private discussion and he conceded defeat. He passed but did everything with his nose in the air as if to say it was beneath him. I may have to keep him 'cause he's an ornery cuss. Or... I could leave him on David's doorstep; David is also an ornery cuss.

My neighbor, MsHairUpHerAss, was hospitalized. I think that "hair" must have penetrated her insides 'cause she had her gall bladder removed. Didn't do anything for her personality; she's still a witch that got kicked out of a coven. We took Peeper Patterson, my next-door neighbor, to visit her. He said she looked great for an old witch.

"Sarrrr....." Jeez. Didn't even get a chance to agree with Peeper before I felt Cowboy's hand on my shoulder.

It is so pretty outside that I've been climbing the trees to wave at God. We have a lot of trees and I don't like to favor one over the other so I've climbed at least 2 each time I'm in the backyard. Saw "Lady Chatterly" and her sugar daddy in their yard... oye, could have missed that scene and lived quite happily.

Cowboy says he doesn't want me climbing trees. I might fall. I don't want him going out to sea. There might be a storm or a war or a leak in the boat. He goes out to sea anyway. I climb trees. He also keeps his right arm ready for instant "tail swatting."

I'm starting a new exercise program. Summer will be here in no time and I have new bathing suits. Couldn't decide between bikini # 1 and # 2 so I bought both. Have to firm up a little. Cowboy says I only need toning in my backside and he'll take care of that. Yeah, right.

The pups and I are jogging 5 miles - up from 3 when the giant squid isn't looking and we're eating more protein. I started doing crunches - tuck my feet under BullyBoy's chest and SweetPea sits at my back so I don't lie flat. It's a bit of a workout but very worthwhile. After 100 crunches, we reward ourselves with a big helping of mac and cheese. If I can work in some bicycle time we devour a box or 2 of Twinkies and chase those with Cracker Jacks. I love rewarding myself.

A vegan I know mentioned the merits of eating more vegetables to cut down on fats and bad-iments. Who are these people? Do their parents still talk to them? I think we should buy another country and put them all together in one place - they could get high preaching to the choir. Give me CHOCOLATE! Give me STEAK! Give me DESSERT! Life is too short to waste it on vegetables.

"SAR!"

SWAT!

Tsk.

~Sar~